Here are some blogs to show the human side of experience cancer as it happens
A strange thing happened to me the other day I woke up not feeling well at all and could not move because I seem to have pain everywhere on my left side and back and burning underneath my stomach I could not figure out whether it was muscular or internal
Alan was kind he’s my boyfriend and helps me a lot with things and issues in life He sometimes gets grumpy and other times happy and kind
He is the same age as me 59 Anyway my daughter had an appointment that day and as usual demanded her tea and toast which I did but I was complaining on how unwell I felt So I took Ibrobufin and a cup of tea and went back to bed Luci and Alan gave me a hot water bottle and I stayed in bed till 12 and then got up to get ready for Luci’s appointment Well I was not any better so I said to Luci that when we get to the hospital I will go to A and E as I needed to stop the pain so Alan dropped us off and said that he would collect us later.
Well I explained that my daughter had an appointment we could not miss so they saw me but we were running out of time so I gave them a urine sample and discharged myself at their suggestion to sign up when I had finished the appointment at the outpatients.
When we got there the queue was really long and I was hurting all over so I told the nurse at the front my daughter had a special need and that I had just discharged myself from A and E but was not feeling great, she immediately took my paper work off of us and told us she would sort it out. The first thing we had to do was go to the main building and get an x-ray so we had to order a porter for me as Luci would not have been able to given the relevant details So I went to x-ray and back in a wheelchair an experience I have not had before. It certainly gives you an insight into how patient people have to be to a person in a wheelchair Any way Luci got her appointment to have her impacted wisdom tooth out so result So after back to A and E to sign back in I saw the nurses that had seen my before but she had someone else so I saw a young doctor who then got the previous notes and put us in the next queue for another doctor to see me. This was strange as I was in a cubicle that I had been many a time with my children now it was my turn after 20 years, but I was in so much agony it did not matter as long as I could get rid of the pains, crawling all through my body and I was so tired too but I had to keep awake as Luci was with me looking decidedly upset so I had to keep my spirits to the full. I was in the A and E the second time from 4 till 10.20 and then they allocated me to the Gynological ward which turned out to be a really caring, clean and light efficient ward I was happy to be there and after settling I had a fitful night Now I had not eaten since 8 in the morning and that was one spoonful of porridge which I did not fancy as I had started retching and nothing was coming out. The breakfast was a god send and although still hungry was really relieved. Soon the doctors came around and I was given an ultrasound scan and then later a CT scan
They told me at the ultrasound scan that I had an enormous cyst and this was later confirmed along with a first stage cancer on my right kidney What a shock this was when the doctors told me later that I had this kidney cancer It choked me and I did not know what to say to the doctor when he asked did I have any questions to ask Of course I had hundreds and did not ask one.
Later I was keen to be discharged to go to my friends funeral so I needed to do three urine samples and I had only done two. I did talk to the doctor who was discharging me about my fear and he reassured me as it was in the first stage I had a big fighting chance, this made me feel better. I made a deal with the doctor and said that if I needed to come back after the funeral I would get a catheter fitted and then they would be satisfied too. With this they let me go. Hurrah that feeling of freedom was amazing the sun was shining, everyone seemed in a good mood and I braced myself for the funeral. As it turned out it was a beautiful memory of her which I will cherish and learn from. She had many friends and associates and was a big member in the community because she took the time to listen and eat cake with people.
The hardest thing is to tell people what is happening without them getting too upset especially those who are your family and that love you. I know what it is like to be close to someone who gets ill and then passes away but at this stage I do not think that I will but I do know that I will go through a pain threshold.
The next stage after telling people is to carry on your normal life this is difficult, as people want to spend time with you as if it is the last time they will see you so between resting and having tests!
Well I suppose that I am very verbal as I phoned the hospital as I was told they were having a big meeting on the Wednesday after being released and so I phoned the cyst doctor Lawton Disney’s secretary and she said the meeting was in the Urology dept. so I phoned there but the secretary said there were no consultants around so I gave her my phone number and did not expect to hear from them but to my surprise the senior consultant did phone and told me that we needed to speak and I needed two tests one a MRI and the other an endoscopy, that’s next week so I will see what that brings, It sounds painful as the camera has to be put down the gullet and right down to the offending areas.
The funny thing is that they have given me an appointment the day before these procedures to discuss the results? I don’t think so and this could be my opportunity to be educated about how to care for myself during and after these procedures and the timing. Tune in to the next blog